starting to really hate this doghouse i'm always in...WTF!

ok...ok...god, i don't even know where to start!

ok, most recent thing:
while talking on the phone to rod (ex boyfriend, now really really good friend who is more like family cause he always sorts out my problems for me) i accidentally said "sweetie" to him. bobby FLIPS out. here's the context it was in: rod was telling me about all the bullshit he is going through right now and my heart was really going out to him because the people are being really shitty. so i was thinking of him more in the brotherly sense. i asked if he was going to be fighting these people and he said "hell yea i'm gonna break some faces!" and that inspired me to say "aw, be careful sweetie!"

i DIDN'T mean it in a relationship sort of way. i meant it as i would say it to anyone who is close to me! guy or girl!

but bobby really didn't like that. i don't know if its more because i call him sweetie or if it was because i was talking to an ex or what.

i mean, i know its bad using the term of endearment that i use for bobby while talking to rod, but it wasn't meant in the same context! and since this is not the first relationship i have ever been in, any term i use will have been recycled from someone else. so what the hell am i supposed to do!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!!?

plus what really hurt and actually made me cry (what a jerk...) was the fact that he totally threw my declaration of being in love with him back in my face. who the hell does that!?!?!?! its just common decency in my view. that was just cruel.

i'm in such shock cause of all the guys i've ever dated, i expected this from bobby the least.